JuicyLesson 140: The Olympic Games … Fear and Loathing in Sochy; Line Brawls, The NHL and Women’s Hockey

Lying around watching the Olympics: first it was the pairs Ice Dancing and now I am having a look at women’s hockey, Canada vs. Switzerland.

As far as the figure skating is concerned, it takes an expert to judge athletic performance here – just watched a Russian pair in slow motion and they looked almost perfect – third place bronze medal for them. As far as the Canadian pair – Moyer and Virtue – is concerned, I couldn’t for the life of me decide who had won, but it looked to me that the Americans had at least one more complicated move than the Canadians. Regardless of the judging controversy in figure skating which has already raised its ugly head, I believe that the Americans actually earned their Gold while Moyers and Virtue deserved their Silver medal. Stop whining about the judging and about the condition of the ice and get on with it.

As for women’s hockey, it’s pretty much a two team race with the Canadian women striving to repeat their gold medal performance from four years ago in Van, and the Excited States, the latter having recently shown that they can definitely play with and beat Canada in international Olympic-like competitions.

I am currently watching the Canada vs. Switzerland game on t.v. in one of the women’s semi-finals which has been pretty much all Team Canada to this point. It’s 3-1 for the Canadians right now with the third period just set to get underway.

About one hour later …
The winner of this semi-final will play the Americans for the Gold medal while the losers will meet the Swiss who have just lost by a final score of 3-1 to Canada as we expected. Game over.

Time to get ready from those American freaking pussies south of the border but not the Deep South if you get my drift. (Hey Paul, that would be the kind of ‘crack’that you gave me shit for, told me this was a six on ten on the road to dismissal. “So,” I quipped, “let me know when it gets to be an eight on ten.” “Mr. Cohen, I’m sorry to say that that’d be too late,” you answered seemingly without either thinking or batting an eye even. Gulp.)

Now the words are coming smoothly, seemingly without effort from me, their author. It might be my physical situation which has something to do with this very enjoyable state of affairs – I am writing on my iPad which I usually do but I am in the kitchen, spinning some tunes. Generally I work on my iPad (with assistance from my iPod) while sitting up in our bed, using two pillows for support, really comfy but I betcha’ five bucks that I’m doing damage to my lower back.
Very comfy, though.

What say you to my getting off this tangent quickly, before it’s too late, and return to the Olympics, specifically to women’s hockey. The last tilt – or was it the second last – between Canada and the U.S.A. prior to these here Olympics was highlighted by an old time donnybrook, that resembled the newly-anointed so-called “line brawl”. (There is something to be said for detail, the use of the comma in English grammar for instance. Dig this: How a Comma Saved a Life – Pardon impossible, to be executed at midnight. Pardon, impossible to be executed at midnight. What a little comma can do. Also of concern is the order for period-closed quote etc. Too many issues to get into right now but believe me when I tell you that there are a number of different examples here. Another issue is ” vs. ‘ usage and I know the fundamentals here as well.) It’s the details that are consuming me right now and I’m still “tangenting” (or is it ‘tangenting’?)

Anyway, the donnybrooks previously referred to rarely occur in the NHL anymore although there have been one or two line brawls this season; one of these involved the Rangers and Canucks dropping gloves and sticks seconds after the opening face-off and taking swings at each other – and believe me when I tell you, again, that some of the swings were serious and of the roundhouse variety. It was in the aftermath of this fight that coach John “Torts” (or is it ‘Torts’?’) Tortorella tried unsuccessfully fortunately for him to get into the Vancouver locker room to have a word with the Vancouver coach, Alain Vigneault. Torts was subsequently fined and suspended by the league for his actions in the wake of the ‘line brawl’.

Anyway, the U.S.A. really beat up on the Swedes in the other semi-final. The score was 6-1, as the Americans tuned up for their gold medal challenge against the Canadians by simply battering – there’s no other description for what happened out there – the Swedes, out shooting them 70-9 in the process.

Save percentage: Sweden: .914 (64/70); USA .889 (8/9). Total domination except for save percentage. Fire the American goalie.

Good luck to men’s and women’s hockey teams. Tomorrow: The twist on Curling: in-turns, out-turns, draws, take-outs, rocks and rolls.

P.S. I have not as yet edited this JuicyLesson. If I find, upon re-reading that more words are necessary to tie things up better than they are now, I will return. Otherwise, these some eight-hundred-and-forty (840) words will just have to do.

I think that this is some of my best work. Certainly came easy enough. Actually, the piece is now a total of 942 words long, still below the one thousand word limit I have set for myself.

And now to finish off today’s JLPD on a lighter note and on the theme that I hate the Progressive Conservatives (PC’s) and whatever it is they stand for:


Peace Out.

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