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JuicyLesson #109: Heroes and Zeroes

Heroes and Zeroes

Heroes: Carey Price, Andrei Markov and Tomas Plekanec – three reasons for the Canadiens beating the Blackhawks 2-1 this past Saturday at the Bell Centre, Pope Francis, Barak Obama, Michelle Obama, Thomas Mulcair Canada’s next Prime Minister, Prince William, Kate and their son, Prince George, Jonathan Mann, the Cult according to Dusty, Dr. Victor Goldbloom, his wife Sheila and their son Michael of Bishop’s University, P.K. Subban, Cory Crawford whose goaltending wasn’t the reason why the Hawks lost at the Bell Centre Saturday night, Marion Hossa, Patrick Sharp, Jonathan Toews, Bobby Ryan of the Ottawa Senators, Martin St. Louis who more than took being rejected by Team Canada in stride, Raphael Diaz and Max Pacioretty who made the Olympic Teams for their respective countries – Swizterland and the United States, Jaroslav Halak Slovak goalie, Jaromir Jagr the gift that keeps on giving, Mario Lemieux, Wayne Gretzky, Bobby Orr, Maurice Richard, Claude Provost and Jacques Plante the first NHL goalie to wear a mask, Adam, Natalie and George of the Medical Cannabis Access Society (MCAS), Juicy Lessons, Carl Aspler, Jock Best, Kathleen Cawthorn, Josh Silverstone, Suzie Epelbaum, Susan Hackel, Denis Cordere, Tom Glavine, Manon Dancose, Arcade Fire, Blue Rodeo’s newest “In Our Nature”, Neil Young “Keep on Rocking the Free World”, the four Jeremy’s – Costin, Frank, Cymet and Richler along with webmaster Aron Black, director/producer/friend Ezra Soiferman, and all the Ruggles: Hilton, Kyle, JoAnn and Monty, Phil and Vera, Albert and Joan Hoyte, Keith Hoyte, Jo Jo, Debra Marshall, Chris, Edward and Susie, the nurses at the Jewish General and elsewhere, Loren Lann and his family – Shana, David and Samuel, Jacqueline Wall, Daniel Schwartzberg, Eric Kirshner, Sarah Phillips, Jane Campbell, Cynthia Scott Li and Rudi Washington.

Nothings: Fucking Rob Ford and his brother Doug, Ted Cruz and other reactionaries in the States (Cruz’s filibuster during the debate leading to the government shutdown in the United States was highlighted by his reading of Dr. Seuss’ Green Eggs and Ham) – fucking shit, the Parti Quebecois, Pauline freaking Marois, Jean-Francois Lysee, and Bernard “down the drain with Bill 60” hearings on the charter beginning this week Drainville, Brian Burke, Michael Applebaum, Gerald Tremblay, P.J. Stock, Michael Cammalleri, Dion Phaneuf, the Leafs collapsing like a house of cards, Alex Rodriguez, Manny Ramirez, Sammy Sosa, Mark McGwire, Raphael Palmeiro, Bobby Bonds, Ryan Braun, and last but not least on this list of liars and steroid users Roger Clemens.



  • Jason Bowen says:

    What am I ?? Chopped Liver !!

  • Jaren Kligman says:

    I would include Zdeno Chara to the list of nothing’s

    • Jerry Cohen says:

      I’ll do it. Next time. Once a nothing always a nothing.

      • Jerry Cohen says:

        Thanks very much re. Barry Bonds. I make that mistake quite often. Too often as a matter of fact. In this case, the apple fell in a totally different orchard.

        • Jerry Cohen says:


          You listed Bobby Bonds in your group of nothings. I assume you meant to include his “distinguished” son, Barry.

          Bobby Bonds was a good guy, at least during the early part of his career. I remember watching a game at Jarry Park during Bobby’s rookie season. I believe he played right field for the Giants at the time. We were standing behind the right field fence (it was one of those overflow attendance games when they opened the empty space in right for standees). We watched Bobby patrolling the hallowed domain of Le Grand Orange for the visitors. To my friends and me he appeared to be modest and down to earth. How he spawned Barry is a mystery.

  • Thanks for the mention, Jerry! I did start drafting that letter I promised you, but somewhere around a pad’s worth of paper into it, my daughter decided it was time to be born! The promised letter will happen…

    • Jerry Cohen says:

      That’s no problem, of course. Congratulations, Jeremy. I’m sure she’ll be both intelligent and beautiful. Let’s see, when she’s eighteen, I’ll be … way too old or dead. Nothing to worry about there. You better start working on the test for her potential dates when she gets older… a lot older.

  • Sarah Phillips says:

    I’m honored to be honorably mentioned!!
    Cheers (and memories).

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